Lessons from Tomcat
Dr. Terri Jennings didn’t need another horse or even want another horse the day she saw Tomcat’s picture on the SPCA website. But something about his proud stance and his soulful eyes kept her returning to that picture several times a week for over a month.
As a psychologist working with horses to help children and adults at Healing Hooves Psychotherapy, Inc. in Davie, resilience and the ability for those who have suffered unthinkable traumas to heal and grow in the right environment are concepts that Terri has built a career upon. It was because of those concepts that Tomcat caught her eye. “It was something about his demeanor that told me he is a survivor - a strong horse who would not let abuse and neglect break his spirit” Terri said as I interviewed her at her home where Tomcat sat watching her every move from his pasture.
Terri’s interest in Tomcat came to a halt when she inquired about adopting him. “I learned that he had serious behavioral problems and had been aggressive towards the volunteers and staff at the SPCA who were trying to help him after he had been rescued.” Dangerous was the word that was used to describe Tomcat and that was enough to make Terri forget about him …..at least for awhile. That label, ‘dangerous’ caused Terri to forget what she initially saw in him. “I had written him off, forgotten about his strengths and his potential. All I could think about was the likelihood that he would hurt someone.”
It wasn’t until a trip to the SPCA brought Terri and Tomcat face to face that she began to rethink her decision. After learning that Tomcat was still there and that his future looked grim, Terri saw him in the pasture. “There he stood in the pasture with his friends just being a horse. Then it hit me, he wasn’t a mean horse, he was a horse full of fear that acted tough to keep people, dangerous people, away.” Terri made several more trips to the SPCA, and each time, Tomcat did his best to scare her away, nipping at her and threatening to kick. “The more I tried to change his behavior, the more aggressive he became, so I stopped trying to change him and just worked on being with him.”
Fearful that Tomcat would be euthanized, Terri agreed to take him. But she knew she was in over her head, “we were headed home with Tomcat in the trailer and I thought- what have I done.” Tomcat spent two months in a friend’s pasture learning how to be a horse again without much contact with people. After a few weeks at pasture, Tomcat was seeking out human contact. At the end of two months, he went to live at Terri’s house with three other horses. Terri remembers those first few weeks well. “I was very cautious with Tomcat, I moved slowly and didn’t ask much of him. I was nervous when I was around him but he was always reasonable no matter what request was made of him. It took awhile but finally I realized that Tomcat was no longer afraid of me, instead I was now afraid of him.”
Having worked through that fear, Tomcat and Terri can often be seen riding the Davie trails. Tomcat has not yet joined Terri’s other horses in conducting therapy at Healing Hooves, but his story has helped many of Terri’s clients who share a similar history with Tomcat.
When I ask Terri how Tomcat has changed her life, knowing that she has changed his, this is what she says. “As we go through life we pick up many labels, some good and some bad. It is rare that people see us for who we really are and rarer for us to have the courage to show people who we are beneath all of our masks. But it is possible. That is what Tomcat reminds me of each morning as he greets me at the gate, ready to start another day.”
Terri has recently begun publishing a series of therapeutic stories for children based on the lives of therapy horses she uses at Healing Hooves. The series is named after her first horse and is called Mr. B and Friends. “I have a plan for Tomcat’s story to be published just as soon as he tells me how it should end.” Terri also plans to donate a portion of the proceeds of Tomcat’s book to the SPCA. You can read more about her work at www.MisterBandFriends.com and www.healinghoovesinc.com.
As I walked down the fence line of Tomcat’s paddock to get in my car at the conclusion of my time with Terri, Tomcat walked alongside me and offered his head in an effort to garner my attention. As I stood there stroking his head, Terri jokingly said “Be careful, that’s my dangerous horse.”
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